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How Savvy Words Can Increase Your Persuasion Success

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I’ve said this before, but it bears repeating — especially in discussions about persuasion: Logic makes you think, emotion makes you act.

Some words are more compelling than others because of their emotional heft. They create powerful mental images to which listeners can readily relate.

That’s why some of the best word choices are aspirational (terms that compliment and inspire), emotional (ones that prompt an immediate response) and involve loss language (which spells out the potential consequences or risks):

  • Our savviest customers; the company’s diverse suite of products; your compelling presentation
  • A sensitive situation; an urgent response; a feel-good solution
  • If we don’t act now, we might have to forfeit this opportunity; are you really willing to surrender to the competition?

    Unpack your trunk of adjectives and punch up the power quotient.

    Instead of just saying the team has to make a decision, try describing it as a crucial decision, or perhaps a far-reaching decision or a key decision.

    Be descriptive of your perception of another person’s perspective as enlightened, critical or well- informed.

    You’ll often see these words repeatedly used in advertising copy, because they repeatedly work: fast, easy, guaranteed, powerful, quick, inexpensive.

    Remember that a strength overdone is a weakness. Judiciously used, well-chosen adjectives can work tremendously; overuse, on the other hand, leads to hyperbole.

    Choose your words wisely.

    • Use These 6 Words to Hear ‘Yes’ More Often

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    When you are in the process of persuading, remember six powerful words that will force you to link a meaningful target benefit to your request: What this means to you is … 

    You can’t say it without saying something after it.

    When you start to focus on your justification points for why someone should take you up on your offer, liberally use this phrase as part of your rhetoric.

    Say, for example, you sell Harley-Davidson Motorcycles and are trying to explain to customers why the new Dark Custom™ series rivals the brand’s traditional bikes. Here’s a good line: “The Iron 883™ positions the Evolution engine in the nimble Sportster frame. What this means to you is you’ll be riding an iconic bike that’s dripping with power and character.”

    And what this means to you is … you’ll hear “yes” more often.

    If you don’t include these six words in your pitch, here’s another six words you might want to get accustomed to saying: Would you like fries with that? 

    How to Argue Effectively

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    I remember a long-ago staff meeting in which I was asked to share my thoughts on a proposal I didn’t much care for.  I knew, though, if I blurted out something like, “I think this is a horrible idea that could potentially debilitate our market share,” I wouldn’t have done myself any favors.

    So I kept my emotions in check and learned a valuable lesson about how to make a valid point in a staff meeting that can potentially change the future direction of a particular initiative.

    The first step is to remain calm — unemotional, even. Don’t change your facial expression or display body language that shows you disagree with something being said. Simply and politely interject and casually reframe the issue under discussion: “If I may interject here, I think the real question we should be asking ourselves is … ”

    Then provide three points supporting your position, and reinforce each one with a fact, statistic, or anecdote: “Why would we want to enter an already overcrowded marketplace with a new product that strays from what we do best? First, we’ll be behind all of the existing manufacturers in the market, and that’s not a place we’re accustomed to being. The latest user surveys suggest we are the go-to brand in all of our product categories; we won’t be with this new one. Do consumers really need or even want another choice? Research shows they already think the market is saturated. Also, some of our current customers might question why we’re moving away from our niche. We’ll be like Coors deciding to sell bottled water in the Nineties.”

    Finally, make a recommendation: “I’m in favor of pouring our resources and talent into a new product that will strengthen our current market share and not erode our credibility with consumers.”

    If your persuasive tactics are met with skepticism or downright ignored, bring in the heavy artillery: “Do we have data and examples that prove there is a need for the type of product you want to develop?”

    If your targets are unable to come up with satisfactory answers, great. Your work here is done. But if they engage your artillery with their own, inquire about the source of that information. Perhaps the firm used to gather market research has been the target of other companies regarding its questionable data gathering.

    This process works in non-meeting situations, too. Consider the people who work at a Kia dealership and need to convince BMW loyalists that Kia’s K900 luxury model (with a base price of $50,000) is an overall better value than that 528i sedan they’re driving now. Those salespeople don’t want to waste their time and energy talking about Kia’s lengthy and successful tradition of making mainstream, economy-friendly cars; they must focus on the fact that Kia is a luxury automobile maker, too, and emphasize that from visual, drivability and technological perspectives, the K900 compares favorably to the 528i. But add in options, and you’ll be paying a lot more to outfit that Bimmer with what comes standard on the K900.

    What Is Enlightened Self-Interest — And Why Should You Care?

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    Although technology, society, demographics, and economies have changed greatly, some persuasive patterns remain remarkably unaltered by time.

    The oldest method of getting someone to do something is to reward or punish, typically known as a “carrot” or a “stick.” Common business incentives include an increase in compensation, recognition or responsibility.  That’s the “carrot” side of this equation; the “stick” side involves punishing someone for either doing or not doing something. Pay is docked, participation in a project is cancelled or the highly anticipated business trip is withheld.

    Rewards and punishments are largely considered coercive actions. The moment you remove the coercion (the carrot or the stick), the coerced individual regresses to previous behavior. Long-lasting career success requires real agreement, not a momentary nod.

    Another age-old approach to attaining buy-in is through normative means, or via the “norms” of a group. As in, “all the kids are doing it.”

    This is a very difficult way to reliably achieve agreement because people are so mercurial. Today, you must be savvier than ever in your approaches to persuasiveness. And the savviest approach of all involves appealing to your target’s enlightened self-interest.

    The concept of enlightened self-interest is largely attributed to 19th century French economist and social observer Alexis de Tocqueville and his landmark work, Democracy in America.

    de Tocqueville’s idea involves doing things that are positive and right (profitable and ethical, in other words). If it’s positive for you (your increased income, your professional status, strengthening your organization), positive for other parties involved (your target and your target’s organization) and positive for the larger whole in which you operate (your industry or your community), then why not do it?

    Self-interest can be good; enlightened self-interest is tremendous.

    Appeal to the enlightened self-interest of others and prepare to hear “yes” again and again.

    Moving Up: 7 Ways to Influence Important People

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    Your ability to influence multiple people can take many different forms, requiring you to “influence up” (your boss, shareholders, a client’s president) and “influence down” (your department colleagues, a new hire, a contracted employee).

    In this post, I present to you seven ways to influence up — which, incidentally, work well in individual persuasion situations, too:

    1. Speak the language.

    How do your targets view their work and their environment? Do they talk about market share, return on investment, return on equity, risk mitigation, competitive advantage, market intelligence, shareholder value, stakeholder opinion, media response, or global presence? Try casting your arguments in your targets’ language. In other words, interpret your goals for acquiring increased development funds in terms of higher market share and make a case for achieving a strong ROI in a brief timespan.

    2. Deal in evidence, not opinions.

    Assemble the facts and remember that we’re talking about rules, not exceptions. The phrase “the exception proves the rule” means the hare beats the tortoise 999 out of 1,000 times. Frequency of occurrence helps support facts and separate anomalies. Make sure your points are evidence-based and unassailable.

    3. Focus on solutions.

    Don’t threaten people with an inquisition. Seek ways to rectify and reconcile so that everyone finds the solution satisfying. 

    4. Concision.

    Don’t tell people everything you know; tell them only what they need to know. You need your targets’ attention, not their captivity. So ensure that you can succinctly state your case in a minimum number of words and allocated amount of time. Which brings us to…

    5. Manage the clock.

    If you end a meeting 10 minutes early, nobody is going to complain. But if you’re running over the allocated time by two minutes, people will rapidly lose interest — even if you held their undivided attention three minutes ago. To avoid that, work backwards, allowing the final 10 minutes of a designated timeframe to be used to develop consensus, determine next steps, set times and dates, and allocate accountabilities. These are busy people, and they have other places to be and people to see.

    6. Stand your ground.

    Maintain the courage of your position, meaning that while you should remain open to other views and even criticism, don’t back down in the face of strong opposition or peer pressure. People are most prone to follow both formal and informal leaders who can take the heat and lead the way through ambiguity and resistance.

    7. Relish the contrarian position.

    “Yes men” are abundant in organizations, and they usually attempt to side with the status quo to remain in the boss’s good graces. If you want to truly succeed at persuasion, be willing to stand out and be identified as someone with ideas that don’t adhere to the overused slogan, “That’s how we’ve always done things.”

    These best practices to “influence up” are based on boldness and brevity, which strong senior people tend to appreciate and respond to positively. Remember, the people with whom you are dealing in group persuasion environments are paid to achieve results, and the quickest, most obvious roads to that success will strike harmonious chords. So make your case in their language with an outcome-based focus in as brief a time as possible.

    What Are You Drinking? How Senses Affect Persuasion

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    Did you know that the type of beverage you drink, the surface of the chair on which you sit and the color of your clothing all play a role in getting to “yes” (or “no”) faster?

    Thalma Lobel, a Ph.D. and director of the child development center at Tel Aviv University, claims that decisions, judgments and values are derived as much from outside factors as they are from our brains.

    In her 2014 book, Sensation: The New Science of Physical Intelligence, Lobel provides scientific evidence of how targets respond to common situations that, on the surface, appear insignificant. Here are some of her key observations:

    • People drinking warm beverages such as coffee or tea are judged by their targets to be more generous, caring and good-natured than those enjoying cold beverages such as soda or iced coffee. The concept of “warm” and “cold” extends beyond the drink and transfers to the individual drinking it. While what you say is important, so is what you drink.
    • That “warm/cold” mentality is at play in other facets of our lives, too. Take the chair you opt to sit in while making your pitch. Studies suggest harder chairs make people tougher negotiators, while softer chairs reduce their aggressiveness. Hmmm. Maybe you should add a soft and comfy chair to your office for guests…
    • Researchers found that men consider women who wear a red blouse (opposed to a blue, green or gray blouse) consistently sexier and more attractive. That kind of social proof can easily transfer to persuasion situations. Red represents strength, power and energy, regardless of gender. Wear it when you need to hear “yes.”

     

    Killer Credibility: 7 Ways to Achieve It, Keep It and Win It Back

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    What can I do to improve my credibility? It’s a question I’m asked a lot, and there is more than one correct answer. In fact, here are seven ways to build and keep — and, if necessary, win back — credibility:

    1. Dress better. Let’s face it: We all are in the image business. If you want to be taken seriously, dress for success. That means you should look clean and neat, and wear shined shoes and clothes that fit well.

    2. Speak better. The occasional colloquialism is OK, but if those are the only things that come out of your mouth, you could find yourself up for a role in the next season of Swamp People.

    3. Know your stuff. Credibility starts with competency. Learn as much as you can from every verbal exchange. In my book, Accelerate the Sale: Kick-Start Your Personal Selling Style to Close More Sales, Faster, I asked executives about their greatest sale. The most frequent response I received? “My wife agreed to marry me.” (True story.) But the response that left the biggest impression on me was the guy who said, “My next one. Because I’ll know more, be able to do more and be able to help the customer more.” That’s a big idea.

    4. Admit when you’ve erred. When you make a mistake, simply say, “I made a mistake. I’m sorry.” Then move on.

    5. Channel Johnny Carson. Johnny Carson is one of my all-time favorite entertainers. When a guest would mention a piece of knowledge outside of Johnny’s realm, he didn’t try to take over the conversation or “one up” the guest. He simply said, “I did not know that.” That’s what I say now. You should, too.

    6. Practice convergent validity. Make sure you have the correct information. Check with three different sources to get their take on a given situation. You’ll be shocked by how opinions vary. Doing this will help expand your network of contacts, better grasp the situation and make stronger decisions. And that, my friends, will give you greater credibility.

    7. Guard your credibility. Your credibility is a precious commodity. Protect it with all you’ve got. Late in his baseball career, while playing injured, Joe DiMaggio still went all out during every at bat and every inning in the field. When a teammate said to him, “Hey, Joe, you’re hurt, take it easy,” Joe replied, “I can’t. There might be someone in the stands seeing me for the first time, and I don’t want to let them down.” Not a bad mindset for the rest of us.

    Here’s to your credibility!

    (Photo by Jared Erondu via Unsplash)

    Why More Than One Point of View Is Critical to Persuasion Success

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    The weather in Wisconsin is finally turning spring-like, and this past weekend’s 80-degree temperatures reminded me of a funny story about persuasion:

    Although my wife and I enjoy fishing together, we are the antithesis of Bassmasters participants in that we fish from a pontoon boat complete with snacks and frequent naps. We basically put our living room on the water and call it sport. The one thing we do share with the pros is fancy “fish finder” technology. We, too, have one of these expensive black boxes that provide sonar‐created pictures of what’s under the boat.

    Fast‐forward to a warm early-June morning as Amy piloted our pontoon living room through a tight channel on Wisconsin’s Whitewater Lake. While she kept a careful eye on the finder, I busied myself preparing the tackle for our day on the water. “Mark, we need to stop here,” Amy said excitedly, “I’ve never seen so many fish!”

    “But we never fish here,” I growled like the character Quint in the movie Jaws, as I made my way to examine the sonar image.

    It was an unbelievable sight. The underwater world around us was exploding with fish. Big fish, little fish and the most picturesque drop‐offs and covers. It was amazing. This was going to be a great day.

    After two hours of fishless‐fishing we couldn’t understand what we were doing wrong. I studied the finder, still teeming with aquatic life.

    We were fishing the simulation.

    Yep, we had just spent two hours fishing the computer‐generated quintessential fishing paradise created by the marketing geniuses at Garmin!

    All of which brings me to this: If you want to hear “yes” more often, you need to have the right “read” on the territory. To do that, practice convergent validity — that is, the idea of getting three points of view before you make a decision or take action. Don’t just take one customer’s viewpoint on your new product or service; get input from three customers. If there is a performance issue with your sales process, observe it for yourself, ask a customer about it and then go to someone else, too.

    Trust me. The fishing will be better.

    How Do You Know Your Persuasive Attempts Are Working?

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    How can you tell whether you’re making persuasion progress with your target in such areas as trust and credibility?

    Here’s how: Consistently observe the other person’s actions — or inactions — to determine the degree to which you’re winning him or her over.

    Here are seven sure signs things are going your way:

    1. Your target volunteers information that is not requested.
    2. Your target shares humor.
    3. Your target accepts pushback and contrary views.
    4. Your target requests advice from you.
    5. Your target shares confidential information.
    6. Your target meets deadlines and respects financial limitations.
    7. Your target initiates friendly follow up and continued contact.

    Now, keep things going!

    Persuasion 360: How to Get Agreement Up, Down and All Around

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    How do you persuade more than one person at a time? You need to acknowledge group decisions don’t get made in group settings.

    Think about that: It’s counterintuitive but inescapably true. Groups hear and discuss, sometimes debate and argue, but they seldom decide as a unit. Rarely will you find a single decision maker. Rather, multiple decision makers — often including but not limited to the budget manager, a hierarchical leader and an informal leader — are involved in the final decision.

    Thus, you need to appeal to fiscal prudence, leadership responsibility, charisma or all of the above. Group meetings must be augmented by one‐on‐one meetings to gain support and woo true decision makers. Consider yourself a congressional lobbyist, but one with scruples and a good cause.

    You don’t need unanimity or an overwhelming mandate to generate group agreement; you need critical mass. Consensus is something everyone can live with, not something everyone would die for. With that in mind, focus on the pragmatism of the numbers. That means “being right” in your own mind isn’t good enough.